"I Am Your Daughter" - A Dedication to Mary Alice Elizabeth
How profound Mom that I should think of you now.
"Grief has nothing to do with me" I said. Oh, but it does.
I am the blood of your blood,I have the cells from your cells. I am so fully your daughter. You who were so very good at body armor and emotional shut down...I am your daughter.
I have never grieved for the loss of you, I just shut you out of my existence and you were gone long before you left this world. I ran from the pain of our "no" relationship.
Yet life doesn't work that way, wherever you go there you are. Instead of escaping the pain I created and experienced pieces of your story and your hell. I was as skilled as you at building the armor and stopping the emotions and connections because I am your daughter.
I was not there for your last years but I have heard that you changed. I am not sure what that means but I have many questions. Did you open more fully to life when you were released by the prison that you had created for yourself? Did you allow yourself to receive the wonderful gifts that your children and the Universe had in store for you? Did you open the doors to LIFE?
From the depths of my heart I hope so because now I understand you on levels that I never have before because I am your daughter. I had to walk some of your path before that realization could come to me.
I thought I had shut you out and off even better than you had done, but that is not so. I am your daughter.
I have given us both a gift..the gift of forgiveness. I was given your Mother's Ring on a visit with my siblings so the energy of you is always with me.
I also want to give you another gift and that is "My Happiness". I have stepped through and beyond OUR veils of fear and lifelessness and I am HAPPY.
I know that you too are beyond that and I am Thankful. So from this earthly plane I want to say "Namaste Momma" and I'll see ya soon.
I love you. Your Daughter, Allene
"Grief has nothing to do with me" I said. Oh, but it does.
I am the blood of your blood,I have the cells from your cells. I am so fully your daughter. You who were so very good at body armor and emotional shut down...I am your daughter.
I have never grieved for the loss of you, I just shut you out of my existence and you were gone long before you left this world. I ran from the pain of our "no" relationship.
Yet life doesn't work that way, wherever you go there you are. Instead of escaping the pain I created and experienced pieces of your story and your hell. I was as skilled as you at building the armor and stopping the emotions and connections because I am your daughter.
I was not there for your last years but I have heard that you changed. I am not sure what that means but I have many questions. Did you open more fully to life when you were released by the prison that you had created for yourself? Did you allow yourself to receive the wonderful gifts that your children and the Universe had in store for you? Did you open the doors to LIFE?
From the depths of my heart I hope so because now I understand you on levels that I never have before because I am your daughter. I had to walk some of your path before that realization could come to me.
I thought I had shut you out and off even better than you had done, but that is not so. I am your daughter.
I have given us both a gift..the gift of forgiveness. I was given your Mother's Ring on a visit with my siblings so the energy of you is always with me.
I also want to give you another gift and that is "My Happiness". I have stepped through and beyond OUR veils of fear and lifelessness and I am HAPPY.
I know that you too are beyond that and I am Thankful. So from this earthly plane I want to say "Namaste Momma" and I'll see ya soon.
I love you. Your Daughter, Allene